Indianapolis Marriage Counseling

Your Ex is in a Rebound Relationship? It Might Just Help You Win Them Back.
By Jamie London

 There are few things as painful as seeing the love of your lifequickly get involved with somebody else - the dreaded "rebound relationship.".


What is really happening in a rebound relationship is that your ex is going out with someone else to help them get over you. For many folks, rebound relationships keep them from having to address the pain of a breakup. Therapists sometimes call such relationships "transitional," that means they assist individuals move on from something significant, like love.

Regardless of whose fault it was, regardless of who finally called it quits, if your relationship was based on true love, it might be ready to be saved - even if your ex is with someone else right now.

Typically people run to someone totally different in a rebound relationship. If you were considerate, their new romantic interest could not be so nice. If you were cheery and fun-loving, there is a good bet the new person can be quieter and more aloof. Or it may be the other way around. The idea is, your ex will focus on what was not right in your relationship, and as you would expect go to something different.

And that is a good thing, for a couple ofreasons. First, it means that your ex remains wondering about you even when going out with the new person. Plus, you may have a chance to work out what your ex really desires in a relationship.

If your ex ran to somebody completely different from you, it in all probability suggests that something they wanted in a relationship was not there in yours. If you actually need to get your ex back, this can be a time to create some changes.

You will be happy to grasp that the vast majority of rebound relationships do not last. So be patient. The more time your ex spends with their new partner, the more they will see their flaws - and the better you will look. And when your ex sees that you have truly made positive changes, that will only improve your image.

No matter what, do not crawl back to your ex first thing. They need to have a chance to comprehend for themselves that they miss you and every one of the nice things about your relationship. So play it cool. When your ex decides to connect, be understanding. Welcome him or her back fondly. After all, this is the new, better you!

Here are a few tips to keep in mind if your ex is on the rebound...

- Allow your ex discover for him or herself that you are what they desire. Do not attempt too hard to convince them.

- If you were wrong, say you're sorry. However only one time. Not repeatedly. If your ex accepts your apology, good. If not, forget about it. Your ex will realize on their own why they love you.

- Even if you think you should make some changes, do not promise to do so. You are the person you ex fell in love with originally. If you make positive changes on your own, nice!

- Never, ever beg. Your ex can only lose respect for you.

Rebound relationships will be very painful for the person left behind. However do not give up hope. A rebound relationship is a clear sign that your ex isn't over you either!

When it comes to relationships, Jamie London has seen it all - wonderful ones, lousy ones, healthy ones, unhealthy ones, a heartbreaking divorce... and eventually finding real, lasting love through online dating. Now Jamie is committed to helping others. Learn more at Jamie's unbiased, fact-based guide to the best relationship products on the Internet at http://www.RelationshipProductGuide.com.