Indianapolis Marriage Counseling

Instructions meant for the Ladies Friendly insight into the psyche of your chap
By Chris Nichols

 Nowadays, I thought I'd inscribe a tiny something for the ladies. A booklet, if you will, on what us guys assume. It might just help you keep away from a vicious fight with your man.


First of all, the jokes you pay attention to concerning guys being dumb jocks who only concern about sex, cocktail and TV (and the games on TV) are accurate. We've been trying to tell you for years, although you go on laughing. It's actuality. Get above it. We discern you females take relief in owning unreal quantities of clothing and shopping for no fine cause, and we've tried our best to come to grips with it. By the same token, you must to admit that we guys are just a tad closer to our Neanderthal brethren than you'd like. We're trouble-free: effort (preferably by means of manly tools), beer, pizza, cocktail, game, sex (or more game and beer, if thats not in the cards), sleep, rinse and duplicate.

Here are selected hints to help you deal with us and our very old ways:

* Converse plainly. If you say it's fair that I gaze at the game, my mind just turned off. Dont attempt to hint that it's not OK. Just tell us what you want us to do. We're usually glad to familiarize (as we are trying to position ourselves for the sex part of the day). We may give you a second chance, by way of a quick, "Are you sure?" But thats it. Dont expect a third chance. Loyal, we almost certainly know you meant no, nevertheless it's just not worth the effort to figure out if your yes meant "sure," your "uh-huh" meant, "Are you kidding? Of course not!" or something in between.

* Counter. Recall Pavlov's experiments? We are similar to dogs. Repay us when we do something you love (chick flick, plants, bake you feast, take you shopping, offer you the credit card to go shopping not including us, etc.) and we'll be more probable to do it again. A little hanky-panky, authorization to go out with the guys or a frosty mug will go a long way.

* Last of all, because we are from Mars and all, no, we actually dont comprehend why it takes two hours to get ready. Anticipate our annoyance. Get started early. You know it's going to take you 45 minutes to change your outfit three times. Build it into the schedule. In the occasion that you disregard, turn on the game, get us a beer (or two, depending on how far behind schedule you are) and tell us to sit firm. We'll not recall we were even planning on that feast and a movie. Just note that if this drags on too long, we cannot be held responsible for drinking all the beer in the fridge and any badly chosen behavior that follows.

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